About Me


Reality does not bow to expectations. Expectations merely mask what is. This is what it is.

— Djoric

I'm osmarks, also known as gollark in some places. I enjoy bending the world to my will and creating confusing and/or funny things through applied computer science and mathematics, among other things. You can contact me through email, Discord, IRC sometimes, Morse code transmitted via HTTP request volumes, carrier pigeon, or ActivityPub (Mastodon).

My work


  • Programming in all cool languages (Python, JavaScript somewhat resentfully, Rust, Lua, Nim, Haskell).
  • Programming in several uncool languages (C, Java), but only ironically.
  • Vague knowledge of contemporary machine learning frameworks and algorithms.
  • Expert knowledge of ComputerCraft (Minecraft mod).
  • Rapid prototyping (accursed hacks very fast).
  • (Arch) Linux (btw) systems administration.
  • Mechanical keyboard.
  • Causing inscrutable networking problems.
  • Bench press: 77.5kg (5RM).
  • Nigh-omniscient knowledge of and concern for English grammar.